10 DIETS to AVOID

THE K-E DIET
Hip new diet or enhanced interrogation technique? The Ketogenic Eternal Nutrition Diet can
apparently help you shed 10% of your weight in just 10 days. Oh but there’s no actual food just a
nutrient rich formula and you never actually eat it. Instead the formula is supplied 24 hours a day,
through a tiny feeding tube which goes through the nose directly into your stomach “But don’t worry
there are no drugs and no surgery” the website assures us.

THE DRIVE-THRU DIET
Who doesn’t dig the occasional Macca’s or KFC pig out. Yet there are a reason why these greasy
indulgences are occasional and by this we mean once a month or less. The Carbohydrate and Fat
intake is so huge, it can takes weeks of exercise to burn off the calories. And if your driving through
and not walking to pick the order up, your already behind the eight ball.

THE MASTER CLEANSE
Also known as the Lemon Detox Diet or you’ll love at the adult nappies not , but we’ll see who’s
laughing later. The Master Cleanse is highly involved , highly preposterous way to cleanse and
lose weight. Just mix lemonade and cayenne concoction , whenever you feel hungry. Which will a lot
and take a laxative before you go to bed. Sorry that’s are gamble we’re willing to take.

THE TAPEWORM DIET
Its almost too good to ingest a Tapeworm , eat as you please and watch the weight go.
And when you come down with symptoms including Abdominal pains and Intestinal
Blockage. Your almost 90% sure whats ailing you.

THE BISCUIT DIET
Versions of this diet generally have you consuming 4 to 6 Amino dense biscuits per
day, adding up to 500 calories. This effectively tricks your mind into thinking your not
dieting.But fun as it sounds we’re all about will power. So don’t call us until there’s
Tim Tam varieties available on the market.

THE CHEWING DIET
Chew your food 30-80 times and then spit out, whatever remains. Wait WTF
Popular at the dawn of the 20th century, the diet is still in use today amoung camels
and a couple method actors prepping for roles on camels.

THE CABBAGE SOUP DIET
“The problem with most main stream diets” the website for the Cabbge Soup Diet
say’s is that “these remembered by master medical instutions work slowly” Agreed
how healthy is a balanced diet. Really, instead try eating Cabbage soup for every
meal for 7 days straight. Now practice saying “Flatulence and lonely nights”

THE BABY FOOD DIET
First promoted br Celebrity Trainer Tracey Anderson. The Baby Food Diet offers some choice you can
eat nothing but Baby food.Eat a mix of Baby food and regular meals or eat Baby food as snack in
between your regular meals. Look younger in no time.

THE AIR DIET
Pefect for guys who love cooking, but hate not the annoying eating part. Evitalably follows the Air
Diet, involves sitting in front of your food, putting some on a fork and staring at it and not eating it.
Supposedly the smell and sight of your food tricks your brain into thinking its eaten. Common side
effects include gross malnutrition and a mild form of post traumatic stress disorder.But you will totally
fit into your skinny blue jeans again.

THE COTTON BALL DIET
The Cotton Ball Diet requires you to injest several Cotton balls a day and because their fluffy. They
like fill you up, right? Filling yes, digestive not so much. If you have ever rushed a dog to the emergency
because he chewed through a pile of ribbon, you have seen a glimpse of your near future.

 

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